


You Quiet The Voices In My Head

by Gallavich4ever



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, First Kiss, M/M, Michael helps Jeremy feel better, Michael is a good boyfriend, Michael is a good friend, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Trauma, Self-Harm, boyf riends - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-14 08:41:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29293077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gallavich4ever/pseuds/Gallavich4ever
Summary: Jeremy hasn’t been okay ever since the Squip. It’s just lucky his best friend Michael is here to help.First BMC/Boyf riends fic.
Relationships: Jeremy Heere/Michael Mell
Comments: 2
Kudos: 24





	You Quiet The Voices In My Head

**Author's Note:**

> Y o so I watched BMC for the first time last night and uh. Well yeah now I’m writing Boyf riends fanfics even though I have like 90 million plus prompts to write. Enjoy!
> 
> Also lmk if you want this to be a series cause I’d be down.

Jeremy Heere is all kinds of different versions of Not Okay. He hasn’t been okay ever since the Squip, and even though it’s gone now, he swears he can still hear its voice in his head, telling him he’s horrible and ugly and worthless and that nobody wants him. He’s hardly his old self from before the Squip anymore. He and Christine had decided that they were better off as just friends, and the only person who he spends an extended period of time with anymore in any sort of significant way is Michael.

This is probably because Michael’s the only one who’s seen the extent Jeremy will go to to make sure he can’t hear the Squip’s voice anymore. He’s walked into the Heere’s house enough times to catch Jeremy in the act of harming himself, and it’s always Michael that stays behind and makes Jeremy feel safe and okay again. They have a policy for these things now. If Jeremy’s feeling really, really bad, he should call or text, and no matter what time it is, Michael will always come. Sometimes it works. But then other times Jeremy’s skin is crawling and burning and hurting too much for him to wait long enough to send Michael a text.

Today’s one of the latter days. Jeremy really does think to call Michael, but a voice that sounds remarkably like the Squip is screaming at him that Michael doesn’t care and that he might as well just end it now while he’s alone and then Jeremy has a vice like grip on his razor and he’s dragging the blade down his arm as he sobs. It’s not enough, so he does it again, and again, and again and again and again.

He’s so out of it that he doesn’t even hear his bedroom door open.

~~~

Michael Mell practically lives at the Heere house nowadays. He comes over every single day to check on his best friend. Sometimes Jeremy is having an okay day, and sometimes he’s having a really bad one. This day is one of the bad ones.

As soon as he sees the razor and the blood and how hard Jeremy is sobbing, he’s rushing over, tearing the blade from Jeremy’s hand with the air of someone who’d clearly done this far too many times before. He tosses the blade into the wastebasket, as he always does when he finds Jeremy in this position, and goes for the first aid kit. 

“Shhh,” he murmurs as he starts to patch his best friend up. “I’m right here, Jerbear.”

“M-Mikey-“ Jeremy sobs, needing Michael’s arms around him but not wanting to make him leave again by being too clingy.

“I know, Jerbear. Lemme finish patching you up and then I promise I’ll hold you, okay?” Michael is the only one who knows how clingy Jeremy can get when he’s like this. “I got you. I promise.”

It takes too long for Jeremy, but eventually Michael’s sliding the first aid kit aside and wrapping his arms gently around the other boy. Jeremy lets out a sigh of relief as he grips tightly onto his best friend, all the noise in his head beginning to go quiet as Michael comforts and shushes him.

“Right here, Jerbear. You’re safe. You’re okay. None of what’s in your brain’s true, okay? I promise I won’t ever let it hurt you again.”

Safe. Jeremy is safe because Michael is here. Michael _does_ care. He repeats those words in his mind as Michael rubs circles into his back.

“Stay?” He pleads softly against the other boy’s chest,

“As if I’d ever leave you alone like this, Jerbear,” Michael replies, keeping his tone light and soft for Jeremy’s benefit.

Jeremy nods, and without even thinking about it, presses his lips to Michael’s. Immediately, Michael tenses, and Jeremy panics as he rips himself away. No no no no NO he’s _ruined_ their friendship and Michael’s going to leave now and Jeremy will be alone with only the Squip’s voice for company forever!

“Jer, Wait-“ Michael’s getting up. He’s trying to reach Jeremy, but in his panic, Jeremy confuses his movements as something else entirely. 

He reaches out, grabbbing a tight hold of Michael’s shirt as he desperately clings to the other boy. “No no no Michael please don’t leave okay I didn’t mean for that to happen I’ll never do it again just don’t go please I don’t want to be alone with the voices okay please I’ll do anything if you just stay!”

“Woah, Jerbear!” Michael’s already wrapping his arms back around Jeremy and tugging him close. “Breathe, okay? I’m not mad. I’m not going anywhere. I was really surprised you kissed me, but...but I was going to kiss you back.”

“Y-what?” Jeremy feels himself start to relax again now that Michael’s reassured him he won’t be going anywhere. 

“I like you, Jer. Ever since Middle school I’ve had a giant crush on you,” Michael admits with a slightly sheepish smile. “I never said anything because...well the Christine thing...I didn’t think you’d like me back.”

“I don’t see her as anything other than a friend anymore…” Jeremy replies. “I...I started falling for you after...after the Squip was deactivated and you started coming over more and...helping me with my shit.”

“So? What do you wanna do about it?” Michael asks, deciding to let Jeremy make the first move.

“...Kiss you? Be your boyfriend? I-if you want!” God, Jeremy looks so uncertain still, so Michael decides to do something about it.

He slams his lips against Jeremy’s, kissing the other boy deeply and feeling a deep sense of satisfaction as Jeremy finally kisses him back.

“Boyfriends sounds nice,” Michael murmurs against Jeremy’s lips in between kisses. “Really-mmm-really nice, actually.”

The voices are quiet now, and Jeremy feels at peace now as he kisses his new boyfriend back. “Love you, Mikey.”

“Love you too, Jerbear,” Michael replies, and the two boys continue kissing long into the afternoon.


End file.
